Yesterday....

I went out with some grils friends from Qwest yesterday to celebrate my birthday. These are by far the coolest over forty woman that I know. We got fairly trashed here at Jose Mulduns. It was a great time. I just know that what I have been needing is some girl time....don't get me wrong. I love Dreamboat. But sometimes....I just need something different than that.
Anyway....if I am half as cool as any of these woman when I am their age.....I will be lucky. My friend Marilyn...I like to think I am her mini-me....is so funny and opinionated. Especially when the alcohol is flowing. Patty....my coach with Sam....is so sweet, sometimes she makes your teeth hurt. And Josie...my sweet Josie....having such a rough time with personal things right now but she always has a kind word and a smile for you.
I just would like to personally thank these ladies for all they do. I love you three.....thanks for making my b-day special.

My brave kiddos

So....call me a crazy mom but, I can't stand when my kids are scared for no reason. I hate them having unfounded fears. I think this might go back to my own childhood and all but...I just can't stand it. Tonight, Brian wanted to see the bird that I have had for years. So, I put the cat in the bathroom (yeah I know...it's a freaking zoo over here) and got the bird out and of course....the kids come out and see what the noise is about. So, I ask if they want to hold the bird and of course....they are scared. So, I brib them...I say I will give you ten bucks a piece if you hold the bird. Well...Gabby is first and she just does it. Zander is a little scared but he does it pretty quickly. Christian is terrified and doesnt' want to do it. So we explain that that is fine but we don't want him coming out and whinning to us about it later. So...he comes out with a long sleeve shirt on and does it too.
This same thing is the reason that I want the kids to have swimming lessons. I am terrified of the water. I have been pulled out of the water twice and I am so scared to be in water any higher than my chest. I don't want that for my kiddos though. I just quitely panic inside and clap the whole time.
I think this is the best thing to do. I don't want to be like the Pink Floyd song. I think it's called Mother. "Mother will you put all your fears into me", I think that is how it goes. Any thoughts oh wise friends of mine. Oh yeah....hope you like the pics...they aren't the greatest but my baby is buying me a digital camera so pretty soon I will have much better pics to post.

Tick tock....

....I feel like the White Rabbit in Alice in Wonderland. I am late...always late...for something important. As I rush head long into another birthday (yippee freaking skippy) and I take stock of my life, I realize that there really isn't much that I do for myself. I am always doing things for others.
Like this blog for instance. I did this blog for me...because I wanted to....and see...I barely ever get on here anymore. I am seriously bitter and angry. And what is sad is...there is just no way of fixing this shit. I am always going to be doing things for everyone else and not myself. I am a mom and that is what we do.
And what is terribly sad is...I think the people that I do all the things for take me for granted and don't realize how much I do for them.
Even sad....and happier and twelve other things wrapped up together is....this friday....my birthday....is my year anniversary of my divorce. I thought I would be a whole lot further in my life than this.
Help

Absence

SO sorry all....I just don't even have a good excuse for being away so long. Everything is good here and I am gearing up for the kids to go back to school....mixture of happy and sad with that......and for my 28th B-day. Those of you who know me, know that I get a little upset around birthday time....since it gets closer and closer to thirty.
That might be what I had in mind when I got my tongue pierced. You know, metal contradicts age....or something like that. But, I finally did it. And I must say....it barely, barely hurt when he did it. Now, it's been aching and swollen off and on since but, I had just a great experience. I was so nervous and I know dreamboat and my tattoo guy was thinking I was going to freak out but....I was very brave.
So....you can expect me back into the groove of things....sorry if I worried any of you.